Getting better and better.....

Photo "Stress on Dynamite" by Stuart Miles courtesy of www.FreeDigitalPhotos.net

....At playing pool? Well, not so much getting better and better, but at least playing a bit more.  No, I'm referring to the fact that I'm getting better from a bout of sickness I didn't know I had until I ended up wired up to machinery in A&E.  Sounds dramatic, but what they suspected at first was a heart attack was actually a panic attack brought on by a protracted period of stress, which was caused by anxiety caused by goodness knows what, but contributed to by a very demanding period of work.

Photo "Stethoscope and ECG" by cooldesign courtesy of www.FreeDigitalPhotos.net

In fact, until this point, I had not realised I was a stress victim - and I don't use that term lightly any more, because I really was unwell, and recovering from this is taking a fair while.  Not only that, I'm generally quite an easy-going person and I don't usually get worked up about everyday things easily, so it came as a pretty big surprise that I was reacting with symptoms of extreme anxiety to what seemed to be everyday events.  But that is what happens when you experience protracted periods of stress, apparently.

Photo "Anxious Calendar" by Stuart Miles courtesy of www.FreeDigitalPhoto.net

Looking back, I can see how it affected my game.  At the European Championship, I was missing shots that normally I would pot. I could feel my arms tremble slightly as I reached for shots and the tension in my arms and shoulders meant there was no way I could relax into the shot.   Worst of all, I could not think through the game, not without my brain getting so fogged up I could not work out what move to make next.  It is often uncertainty, the lack of ability to take those snap decisions as you walk round the table, that throws away a game.  I was mentally exhausted, although at the time I thought things were alright and I was having a bad tournament.

Photo by ArtJSan courtesy of www.FreeDigitalPhoto,net

The way stress affects a game goes deeper than pre-match nerves.  Most of us get pre-match nerves and every player has his or her own way of dealing with it - have you ever met the Talker, who just doesn't shut up because jabbering a meaningless commentary as he watches a game is his way of easing the tension?  Inevitably the Talker will encounter the Silent Type who would rather chew his nails and visit the loo regularly than enter conversation with anyone while he waits for his game.  Playing pool tournaments can be illuminating for any people-watcher!

So I've had medical help, and a period of rest, and I can feel myself getting better and better.  I'm exploring different ways of dealing with stress so I don't relapse, and playing pool is most definitely one of them.  It distracts me from day to day life.  It helps me focus, balance, strategise and return to making fast decisions with confidence.  I think I walk miles round the tables too - which may not get quite the aerobic exercise I should be getting but it is all positive for the health, I'm sure.  

Photo "Pool" by James Barker courtesy of www.FreeDigitalPhoto.net

I'll go into the health benefits of cue sports in one of my future posts, but for now, I'm going to keep enjoying the walks to the tournaments, the interactions or banter with other players, and the sense of relaxation and satisfaction at the end of the game, whether I've managed to get any further than first round or not.  Luckily, I live in a place where most venues are within walking distance - especially if I want to exert myself up a hill or two, and the evening sunshine dipping over the Bay of Gibraltar is a spectacular backdrop to remind me that loving life is far more important than hanging on to anxiety.

Evening view on my way to a practise session of pool, Gibraltar harbour looking over the Bay